Fairy tales and fantasies: Are Hollywood endings killing relationships?

A recent article in The Herald Sun reports that the Hollywood notions of”happily ever after” is killing relationships.

The report claims they “create higher and often unrealistic expectations and in some cases creating pure unliveable fantasies on partners or spouses that they are then expected to live up to.”

So exactly when did the line between fact and fiction start to blur? For most girls, it’s about age 3. I know because I’ve seen it. Disney has a heck of a lot to answer for.

If you saw my DVD collection you wouldn’t be surprised to hear that I’m a sucker for a happy ending.

Human Behaviour Expert Dr John Demartini, who is due to address a Melbourne seminar later this month, says too many women are looking for the equivalent of Brad Pitt. They subconsciously (and I don’t doubt consciously as well) punish their partner for not living up to their unreal fantasies and expectations.

Hands up if this is or has been you? *raises hand slowly* Yup. Me too.

When you’re single and dating you often hope that Prince Charming is only one frog-kiss away. However, I am starting to think I pass up dozens of perfectly decent guys in the process while holding out for something that may not even exist. Dr Demartini reckons we need to check our expectations at the door and be happy to “love the one we’re with” (cue musical interlude).

I can think of a number of occasions where I’ve enjoyed the company of a great guy only to park any though of a future because he was too short (the most common)/too fat/too thin/too old/too young/too poor/too hot (yes, that was particularly stupid of me that time)/too smart/too dumb… You could say I’m like the Goldilocks of dating: I’m looking for someone who’s juuuuuust (perfectly) right (for me).

The article really got me thinking about a few thoughts that had been floating around in my head – that maybe it’s time that I a) let go of my own Cinderella syndromes when it comes to dating and The Perfect Guy and that b) there are scores of perfectly great guys out there and it’s about time I loosened up on some of those “must haves” and just say yes to getting to know someone.

I promised myself earlier this year that I was going to open my heart – to new people and new experiences. Now let’s see where that may lead…

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2 thoughts on “Fairy tales and fantasies: Are Hollywood endings killing relationships?

  1. Well said hon, could not agree more. And I don’t just think that it is girls suffering the problem! I know a few dudes that have almost given up on relationships because it just got too hard, but life isn’t as easy as a Katherine Heigl rom-com, real life is the stuff you DON’T see in the movies, but it’s what makes it real life.

    Keep up the awesome blogs! Love jumping on for a read

  2. Pingback: Five in Five: Date 1, Friday 10 February | Me Versus Love

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